The love of his life
by KissingaPirate
Summary: Spoiler book 7. What if Severus told Lily about his feelings instead of watching her walk away? SeverusLily and LilyJames. Okey, I got many reviews that wanted me to continue, so I will try a bit more.
1. Chapter 1

A/N: A little idea that pop up in my head. If you haven´t finished reading the 7:th book, don´t read. This is my version on what happened when Severus tried to explain for Lily why he had called her a Mudblood.

Disclaimer: The characters belong to JK Rowling and a part of the conversation between Severus Snape and Lily Evans also belongs to JK. I don´t own anything; expect the plot and the name Prokins. So don´t sue me.

"Lily!" Severus yelled after the girl. She didn´t turn around. With her head held high she walked inside the Gryffindor room. Before Severus could reach her, the painting of the fat lady closed.

"You are not allowed to be here!" she said in a thrill voice.

"I need to talk to the girl that just walked in!" he tried, but the fat lady refused. Severus Snape was in his 5.th grade at Hogwarts and he couldn´t be any more miserable. The only happy moments he had were the times with Lily Evans. His best friend since they stared at Hogwarts. It was he who had told her everything about Hogwarts and the wizard world. Soon, the friendship he had cared about like a treasure in his heart, had turned into something more. But he knew that Lily never liked in him that way. And now, all they had was destroyed because of that awful Potter. If he hadn´t made Severus so angry, he wouldn´t have yelled that terrible word to her. Now, she didn´t want to talk to him. Severus got an idea. He lied down near the portrait. When she would come out, he would be there, and he wouldn´t leave her alone until she had heard him talk out. Soon someone came walking in the corridor. He looked up and wrinkled his nose. It was that terrible girl Mary Prokins. She was always the first one to know the best gossip and never hesitate to tell everyone. But this time, Severus was going to use this to his advantage.

"What are _you_ doing here?" she said when she spotted Severus.

"I am going to stay here until Lily comes out and speaks to me." He said.

"But…but it is soon night…" Mary said. He could almost see the sparkle in her eyes when she thought about the whisper and all the talk when she told everyone about it.

"Well, then I will sleep here too. Now leave me alone!" Mary almost ran to the portrait, whispered the password so Severus couldn´t hear it and hurried inside. Now he just had to wait.

SSLE

Lily was sitting in the Gryffndor common room in the comfy chairs that was in front of the fireplace. When a tear fell down her cheek she wiped it off angry with the back of her hand. He wasn´t worth it. She had stood up for him every time someone talk behind his back and every time someone questioned why she still hang around with him. And he ha called her _that_ the worst name you could ever call anyone. And she thought that he was her best friend!

"Do you know who is standing outside the Fat lady? Snape!" Lily heard Mary Prokins whisper very loud to her friends. "and do you know why? Because he wants to talk to Evans. He also says that he will sleep outside if he has too!" Lily could feel everyone´s eyes on her. It was too much for her, so she rose from her chair and walked to the portrait.

SSLE

"You came out." Said Severus as Lily came out. She was wearing a dressing gown.

"I only came out because Mary told me you were threatening to sleep here."

"I was. I would have done. I never meant to call you Mudblood, it just-" begun Severus. But Lily cut him off.

"Slipped out? It´s too late. I´ve made excuses for you for years. None of my friends can understand why I ever talk to you. You and your precious little Death Eaters friends." Lily sounded angry and looked into Severus black eyes. When he met them, he saw that her green ones was sparkling. But not out of joy or happiness as they used too, but out of anger.

"You don´t even deny that´s what you´re all aiming to be! You can´t wait to join You-Know-Who, can´t you?"

Severus tried to explain for her how everything was, but he couldn´t get the words out. Lily continued.

"I can´t pretend any more. You´ve chosen your way, I´ve chosen mine."

Snape´s eyes widened.

"No – listen, I didn´t mean –" he begun, but Lily cut him off once again.

"-to call me Mudblood? But why did you? I thought we were best friends!"

"Because..I…I…" he started. Lily looked at him, waiting until he would say something. When he didn´t, she turned around and walked against the portrait. He then realized that she was leaving him and if he didn´t do anything she would leave forever.

"Because I love you." Lily stopped. She slowly turned around and looked at him, surprised.

"Because you love me?" she said. "You called me a mudblood because you love me?"

"I know it sounds crazy, but I was so angry at Potter, and he likes you, and you probably like him too…" Lily cut him off by kissing him softly on the lips. Severus was so took by surprised that he pulled away. The anger in her eyes was still there, but now he saw something else too.

"I don´t love Potter. He is nothing but a jerk. Not even if he would show everyone that he could be mature, which would happen when hell freezes over." A small smile lingered on Severus lips. Then he lent in and kissed her, this time the kiss deepened, and he could feel her hands slowly lay behind his neck. He put his own hand on her back. It was the most wonderful moment in his life.

"And who do we have hear? Is it…" the voice stopped. Lily and Severus separated quickly from each other to look at who was coming. It was no one else than a very shocked James Potter.

A/N: What do you think? Was it good, was it bad? Want to know!

A/N2: I have been spell checking everything and it should be right this time. I can´t say how glad I am for all the reviews I got. Thank you so much!


	2. Chapter 2

A/N: I got many reviews from the first chapter that asked me to continue. Why I haven´t so far is that I was a bit scared that it wouldn´t turn out so good as the first chapter. But now I have tried. So I hope you like this too, and if you don´t, then pretend that I never published it! Happy reading!

Disclaimer: Just so you know, I wont write disclaimer once again, cause I have already done that and I don´t claim that I own it. And if I did I wouldn´t sit here right now, I would make a book with AU endings, and you would have to buy this in a bookstore instead of reading in it for free here! There, now you know!

"Potter, who I kiss, isn´t non of your concern." Said Lily angry. She pressed her book hard against her chest as she walked down the stairs.

"But Snivellus?" said James with a disgusted tone in his voice.

"Stop calling him that!" Lily turned around and faced James.

"He has never done anything to you. He has always acted sweet towards me, but you have only tried to show yourself more than you are. So grow up!" with those last words she hurried off. When James was about to follow her, the stairs moved and Lily was gone.

"Damn!" James said.

**SSLE**

Lily walked with angry steps. She was very upset. How dared he put his nose in her life? He had no right to it! She didn´t noticed that someone, who was in deep thoughts just like her, walked towards her. She bumped into the person.

"Watch out!" she snapped. She looked up and met Severus surprised eyes,

"Oh, sorry, I wasn´t angry with you at all, it is just that everything is…" she stopped there and took a deep breath. Severus smiled.

"You don´t have to tell me who you are angry with." He said.

"Hey Evans!" a voice came across the corridor. Lily turned around only to see James Potter running towards her.

"Leave me alone, Potter!" she said and turned to Severus again.

"Please Lily! Just let me talk!" James almost begged. Lily didn´t care. She was tired of James' trying to make her go out with him. He never understood what 'no' meant.

"Go away Potter, or I will." She said. James sighed and walked past Lily and Severus. But when he walked past Severus he whispered: _Levicorpus_. Immediately Severus was lifted to the air upside down. James let out a laugh and then hurried away.

"Sev!" Lily tried to pull him down, which was impossible. Severus face turned red of all the blood that rushed to his brain.

"What am I going to do?" Lily was almost panicked. She had seen this jinx several times, but had no idea what the counter-jinx was.

"Say _Liberacorpus_." Severus finally said. Lily said the counter-jinx and Severus fell to the ground.

"Oh, I am so sorry! Did it hurt?" Lily bent down and gently pulled away his hair from his face. He smiled at her and rose from the ground.

"Stupid Potter." He muttered. Lily could do nothing but agree.

"Come Sev, lets go to class now." Severus nodded and picked up his books from the ground and followed her to the dungeons.

**SSLE**

"I mean, what does she sees in him?" James said angry.

"I don´t know, maybe she has a serious wrong in her brain that makes her get weird feelings for weird people." Answered Sirius. He turned the page in his copy of the book _Intermediate Transfiguration._ After reading two lines he threw the book on the floor.

"What's the point of reading this rubbish? I don´t care how you turn a peacock feather into a glass. If I want a glass then I only ask Kreacher to bring it for me!" Sirius said.

"Don´t change the subject! I want to know, why she can kiss Snivellus and not even go out with me." James was sitting in the Gryffindors common room. It was dark outside, and Lily wasn´t there. He had gone early to the common room to talk to her has fast as she got inside. But she never showed up. And no one had seen her before either.

"Relax Prongs." Sirius yawed. He had heard this over and over again so he was really tired of once more here it again. "Why don´t you just stop care and let her come to you?"

"What if she never comes to me then?" James asked and looked at his friend.

"Look, I am no good at this with feelings and stuff. But what are you going to do other wise? Continue until she hates you, or are you going to trick her to drink a love potion?" James laughed at his friend´s idea.

"I hope you will not, or I will hex you to Asia!" a voice came. James and Sirius turned around fast and saw a very angry Lily standing behind them.

"Hi Lily!" Sirius smiled to her. "We were just talking about you."

"Yeah, I heard that." Said Lily. She looked at James.

"If I go out with you on ONE date, will you shut up and leave me and Severus alone?"

James looked surprised.

"One date?" he asked.

"Yes, one date. And then you will stop bother me."

"I promise you Lily that I wont bother you, but if you enjoyed the date, then you will have to go out with me again." James said quickly.

"What? No, you aren´t making the rules here. One date."

"But if you enjoyed it, then you might want to go out with me again!" James tried again. Lily sighed.

"If I liked it we can talk about it then, but until now, it is as I say." With those last words she went off. As soon a s she was gone, James rose from his chair and jumped up on it and screamed: YES!

Everybody started to look at him. Pink in his face her sat down again. Sirius looked up at him.

"Well, now you got a date, don´t screw it up, Prongs!"

"I wont, Padfoot." Answered James.

**SSLE**

Lily sighed. She had just told Severus about the date, and he wasn´t happy about it.

"Please Sev, he promised that he would leave me alone after a date. And I can assure you that I wont like it."

"But what if you do?" said Severus as he put down the frogeyes in the cauldron. It was potion class and Lily and Severus worked together. Hey talked with low voices so no one would here them. Lily looked up and glared at James, Severus, Remus and Peters table. James looked back and smiled. Lily didn´t return the smile and looked down again.

"Don´t worry Sev." Said Lily. Severus was silent for a while. He looked up at Lily once more.

"What now?" she asked when she noticed him.

"Why haven´t you spoken to me about the kiss?" he asked and looked her right in her eyes. She didn´t look away.

"Because I don´t think it is anything to talk about." She answered. She looked down and chopped the dragon scales to small pieces with a silver knife.

"It isn´t anything to talk about? We kissed, and you think that is nothing?" Lily could here to hurt tone in his voice.

"I didn´t say that the kiss was nothing, it´s just a bit confusing now. Please Sev, understand me. You can´t do this to me, not now! I have so much on my mind now. The OWLs is going on, and everything is to much now." Lily looked at him with pleading eyes.

"I do understand Lily, but I have a feeling that you don´t want to talk about because you are afraid what Potter will tell everyone." Lily's eyes flashed with anger.

"How dare you say that to me? First you insult me and when I forgive you insult me again!"

"I am sorry. I don´t know why I said that. I guess I am a bit stressed up to." Said Severus.

Lily nodded and went back to chopping the dragon scales. But deep inside Severus wished that the date would never come.

A/N: So I guess, I will continue a bit with this story. But I will be careful, cause I don´t want it to completely be destroyed.


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: Well, here is the third chapter! The date is here! Oh and by the way, James is a chaser, not a seeker. You can read it on the HP lexicon. So now you don´t have to wonder why James made goals when he talks about it.**

Lily stood out side the gates to the Hogwarts grounds. She was supposed to meet James Potter there for 15 minutes ago, but he hadn't showed up yet. It was a sunny day and everywhere people lay in the grass and talked or were on their way to Hogsmead. It was the last day you could visit Hogsmead before the summer´s end and many students were going to buy some presents to friends and family or just enjoying a day off from school. Lily loved Hogsmead. It was a perfect place with many cute stores. She looked at her watch again. Now he was 20 minutes late. She sighed.

"Where is he? And why is he so late?" she muttered under her breath.

"He is here, and he is late because his friends had to remind him over and over again that not be a complete ass and screw this up." Lily turned around and met James Potters dark brown eyes. He smiled at her and eyed her from top to toe. He nodded as to say that she looked good.

"So, your friends actually said something good for once in their lives?" said lily with a playful twinkle in her eyes. James played along.

"Oh, yes I was shocked too. And even more shocked when I realised that I actually will follow their advice." Lily laughed. He had humour. That was always a good thing. They started to walk towards the small village. James started to talk about the game that had been last week. He and his teammates had won the Quidditch cup against Ravenclaw. James had made the made the most goals. Lily sighed. Why was it that guys always had to talk about sport?

"I bore you out." James stated.

"A little, it is interesting to watch sometimes, but it is not my favourite subject to talk about." Lily smiled.

"Okay, what do you like to talk about then?" asked James.

"Well, I´m not sure. I guess everything, but not to much sport." Lily said with a laugh. James looked at her. Lily noticed it and stopped laughing.

"What?" she asked.

"Nothing." James said and looked away.

"No, tell me. What it is?" Lily stopped and waited for an answer.

"It´s just that you look really cute when you laugh." James said and turned pink on his cheeks. Lily turned pink to and mumbled a 'Oh really?'

They continued walking with an awkward silent between them. Luckily they reached Hogsmead.

"So, where do you want to go first?" asked James.

"Hm, I think I want to go to the book store first, if that's okay."

James understood that this wasn't the time to start teasing her going to a bookstore the first thing so he only nodded and follow her inside. She didn´t even look around or looked at the table with new books (_'How to put on the perfect make-up in 4 seconds'_ _'Gillewig´s fantastic spells for witches with bad-hair day'_) She walked straight to the section with potions. James followed her.

Lily was focused on the books in the shelves that she hardly noticed James behind her. She found the book she had been looking for, for months. She sighed a bit.

"What is it?" asked James.

"I want this book, but it is still too expensive." She put the book back in the shelves. She turned around.

"Were do you want to go now? We have been here now, so now you can decide." But James wasn´t listening. Instead he took the book down again.

"How much do you need?" he asked.

"3 Galleons." She said. James started to search his pockets.

"No, you don´t have to…"Lily begun but James interrupted.

"I want to. Please." He looked up at her and held the three golden coins in his hands. Lily smiled at him.

"You are actually kinda sweet." She said and took the money. She paid the book and they went out.

What they didn´t noticed was a shadow following them out.

They walked to Honeydukes and spend 30 minutes in there joking about what they didn´t want to eat. Later on they walked out and walked in the streets just enjoying the warm weather. They walked to The Three Broomsticks and ordered each a Butterbeer and sat in a corner far inside the shop.

"So, how has the day been so far?" James asked.

"It has been…nice." Said lily.

"So you will go out on another date with me?" he asked hopefully. Lily raised an eyebrow.

"We can talk about that later, they day isn´t off yet." She said.

"You´re right. I will have much more time to convince you." James smiled towards here.

They sat for a while chatting about nothing.

"How come that you hang out with that Peter Pettigrew anyway?" asked Lily.

"Oh, he is just a rat that follows the big guys." James joked.

"Yeah, I have always thought that he was a bit… rattish." (Btw, I rattish even a word? I don´t think so, but now it is) said Lily without knowing how close she was to the four boys secret.

James nodded without thinking. He was starring outside the window. He has just thought that he has seen something or someone.

"What is it?" Lily asked, still with the smile on her lips. She bent over the table to watch outside the window, and brushed with her hair on James cheek. He closed his eyes for a single moment and felt the smell of her hair. He opened them quickly. He didn´t want to look like some freak that smells on other people's hair.

"Oh, nothing, I thought I saw someone watching us." He said. Lily got suspicious and looked out again. She didn´t see anybody. She sat down again.

"Well, should we go back to school now?" asked Lily.

"Yeah, sure." James answered. They rose from their chairs and walked out. They didn´t talk much on their way home. Suddenly James stopped and turned around on the spot. He looked angry at Severus that stood only a few meters away.

"I knew you were following us!" James said. Lily, that hadn´t noticed anything going on stopped and turned around. She looked surprised at Severus.

"Sev, what are you doing here? I thought you wouldn´t go to Hogsmead today." She looked a bit confused.

"I change my mind." Said Severus, now pink in his face.

"You were following us!" James yelled at him.

"James, calm down, maybe he just went to Hogsmead and went home by the time we did. He doesn´t mean anything with it!" Lily took his arm and tried to drag him from the place. The last thing she wanted now was a fight between them.

"I have seen him all day! Lurking around in the shadows like a Death Eater!" James said angry. He had stopped walking towards Severus when Lily had taken his arm.

"James! Don´t say that. He isn´t a death eater!" Deep inside something twitched in Lily. She had called him that too, when he had called her a mudblood.

Severus just stood there, lonely in the grass. He looked at Lily. Almost begged with his eyes.

"Lily, I didn´t follow you. I was just walking around. And then I thought to go home and saw you here. Please Lily, believe me!" Severus walked closer.

"I do believe you Sev." Lily said. James just shook his head.

"Evans don´t tell me that you actually believe him!"

"And why not?" Lily´s voice became high. "He is my friend and he wouldn´t lie to me. Right Sev?" Lily turned to Severus. When he met those green eyes, he knew that he couldn´t lie to her. He looked down and refused to look at her.

"Sev? Tell me that you didn´t follow us?" Lily demanded. He closed his eyes and just shook his head.

"What do you mean by shaking your head? Answere me! Did you follow us in Hogsmead?"

Severus sighed and whispered: "Yes, I did." He looked up.

"I was worried for you. I thought something might happen."

"What was going to happen? Nothing! Potter wouldn´t hurt me. He wouldn´t dare too!"

James woke up when he heard his name in the same sentence as 'wouldn´t dare'

"What? What isn´t I don´t are to do?" he asked. Lily just gave him one looked and turned to Severus again.

"Nothing would happen to me." She started again and then became quite. She gave a small 'oh' and looked with sad eyes on Severus.

"I asked you to let me do this alone. I have to sort things out. Please Sev, just let me be alone." She whispered.

James didn´t get anything. What was it Snivellus said that Lily suddenly understood. Everything was still in his head. Then Lily turned to him.

"Thanks James for a great date. I had a lot of fun today." Then she hurried away. Left were Severus and James. James only gave one look at Severus and walked away.

Severus looked down on the grass. He was afraid that Lily might like Potter more than him now. And that something would have happen between them. What if they kissed? Would Lily like a kiss with potter more than she liked the kiss with him? Confused over his feelings and worries he hurried away towards the castle. He had no idea how things would end up now.

**A/N: So what did you think of this chapter? Was it good? Was it bad? Please review. Tell me if there is something I should add and if there is something I should write less off. I want to be better, and the only one who can help me is you!**


	4. Chapter 4

A/N: Sorry for the late update! I have schoolwork up to my ears! Thanks for everyone who has reviewed! It is that keeps me going! Anyway, here is the Last chapter, rewritten. I wasn´t happy with my last chapter, I felt that it wasn´t what I wanted to end with. So I rewrote the last piece and here is the result. Thanks to everyone who had read and reviewed. You all deserve a big cake, with your name written on. Love you all!

"So he followed you to spy on you?" asked Thyra Thorn. Lily nodded. Thyra was her best friend since they begun Hogwarts. Thyra had two brothers that went on Hogwarts to, but in Huffelpuff.

"Wow, this guy must have a huge crush on you or something." Said Thyra and smiled. Lily sighed. Even if Thyra was her best friend, it was always annoying every time she brought up all the guys that ever had a crush on Lily.

"Do you remember when Christopher Johnson asked you out? I have never stopped wondering why you said no to him."

"Enough with the boy-wants-to-date-me thing! I need help here!" Lily threw a pillow on her. Thyra waved with her wand and the pillow turned to a feather.

"Hey, that´s my pillow! Turn it back!" said Lily and laugh. Thyra only smiled and picked up the feather. She played with it with her fingers.

"I will turn it back, as soon as we solve this problem. But first, how was the date with Potter?"

Lily sighed one more time. And gave away all the details. Thyra nodded in the right place, smiled at every cute thing James had done and laughed loudly when Lily told about Severus.

"It´s not funny! I don´t know what to do." Lily pouted with her lips.

"Okay, okay. Well, who do you like most?" Thyra asked, still smiling.

"I don´t know. James is a sometimes a real moron. But Severus could be that to. But on the other hand, Severus has always been nice to me." Lily shook her head to clear her thoughts.

"I don´t know what to do. And I don´t sleep good either. And I guess I will sleep even worse now."

"Why not?"

"Well, you promised me to turn my pillow back as soon as we fixed this problem. Well, we haven´t, so my pillow will be a feather all night." Lily smiled. Thyra laughed, turned back the pillow and threw it at Lily.

* * *

"And then she said that the date was great and ran away!" James talked to Remus, Peter and Sirius. He had just explained the date for his closest friends. 

"I told you not to screw it up." Sirius muttered under his breath.

"I didn´t screw it up. She liked it remember? Or do you even listen?" James said angry. This was a serious matter, and as always Sirius just waved it away. Remus looked a bit bother. He had listen to this way to many times. But James had a really bad temper, so if you didn´t listen to him, hell would come to earth.

"Well, she did like it, and she is angry at Snape for following her. So maybe you got a bigger chance on her now." Said Remus. James thought on that for a while until his face lit up.

"You´re right, mate!" He looked a lot happier.

* * *

The next day at potion Lily sat next to a girl in Ravenclaw. She didn´t want to talk to Severus now, not after what he had done. It wasn´t that he had followed her she was angry. She was angry because he didn´t trust her enough to let her care things on her own. The Ravenclaw girl, Fanny Summers, was a nice girl that talked a little bit too much and to fast. But she was good at what she was doing anyway. Severus shot glances at her through the whole lesson. Lily acted as she didn´t noticed. 

"Hey, Evans!" Lily turned around and looked up at James.

"Hey." She said.

"So, you said that you liked the date. And remember what we said? If you liked the first date, you would come on a new one." He said with a smile.

"No, we said that could see, and that I decided if I wanted to go or not." She said and returned the smile.

"So, what do you decided then?" he said. Lily looked at Severus, who looked at them. James noticed it and smiled.

"Of course I won't say where we are going until later, so we won't be followed he said." Severus looked angry at what he said. Lily saw this and only shook her head and turned back to James.

"And what have you had in mind?" She asked and smiled.

"Oh, I don´t know. And as I said, it will be a surprise." James smiled back.

"You can´t be serious." Said Severus. He had come over to their table. He looked at Lily with a piercing glaze.

"Don´t do this! You promised you wouldn´t!" He said and pretended that James wasn´t there.

"You can´t tell me what I can and not do." Lily answered and if glances could kill Severus wouldn´t even be a pile of dust.

"You were the one who didn´t trust me enough. You followed us only to make sure that I didn´t do something that would make YOU miserable." James looked between them and slowly backed away and walked to his friends. Fanny wasn´t sure what to do, so she sat down and started to read in her book.

"You kissed me and I thought that you liked me and not him." Severus whispered furious.

"I said I was confused. I like you, but I like James too! I don´t know what to do! Do you rather want me to ditch James to be with you and leave you to wonder for your whole life if I did choose you out of love or for you said it?" said Lily with an even more furious but still low voice.

"Yes, maybe I want." Severus said before thinking through what he said. Lily looked shocked.

"I don´t think we have more to say each other. Leave me alone." She said, and she looked so hurt, so sad and turned around.

"Lil, I´m sorry, I didn´t mean…" he begun.

"Leave me alone." She repeated. And that was when he made his biggest mistake. He walked away.

The tears dropped down in the cauldron and made the colour change from the perfect green to turquoise. She didn´t even try to fix it. She sat like that until the class ended and they started to clean everything up.

* * *

The weeks passed on. Lily had gone out on more dates with James, and she enjoyed them. Soon the sadness from the "break-up" with Severus was replaced with anger at his behaviour. 

They had stopped talking, but Lily could still feel his eyes on her.She had started to like James even more.

It was in their seventh year that James proposed to her. She said yes without even a thought. She was really happy about it. But the only thing that bothered her was that when she had the ring on her fingered and showed everybody, Severus saw it. He had opened his mouth to say something, but close it again. His eyes were filled with hurt. Anger and still after all this years, love. It had hurt Lily the most to see the love. The anger she felt had faded away by the time. And it was many times she was walking towards him to talk. But he had walked away, pretended that he hadn´t seen her. She couldn´t blame him. He was hurt over the fact that she had chose James over him.

* * *

**Year 1979, 14 December, Lily´s and James´ Wedding.**

Lily stood in a small room filled with flowers. Her dress was the most beautiful piece of clothes she had ever seen. She had a bouquet of white lilies, pink roses and lime green small flowers, which she didn´t know the name of. She had a old necklace from her mother, a new dress, borrowed shoes and a blue band that held the flowers together. Her friends that had helped her had walked out to make themselves ready. A small knock heard on the door. Lily frowned.

"Who is it?" she asked. The person didn´t answer. It only came a small knock again.

"Is it you, James? You know you can´t see the bride before the wedding. It means bad luck" She said and laughed.

"It isn´t James." A man's voice came. She recognized the voice a bit, but couldn´t place it. She walked to the door and opened it. A tall man with black hair and black eyes stood on the other side.

"Severus." Was all she could say.

"May I come in?" he asked. She nodded and moved to let him through. She couldn´t speak. She hadn´t talk to him for so long, and she had thought that she never would see him again.

"Are you sure you are doing the right thing now?" he asked and looked at her. "By the way, you are beautiful." He added. Lily smiled to him.

"Thank you. And yes, I´m sure of what I´m doing." She looked down at the bouquet and seemed very interesting in the flower arrangement.

"But?" Severus added.

"There is no but, no but at all. Completely buts less." Lily said and now it was clearly that it wasn´t the flowers that interested her.

"Come on, Lil, I can see there is something." Severus tried. Lily looked up and met his eyes.

"I missed you." She only said.

"And I missed you too." He said as he walked closer. "Please, think through all this before you do anything." He said and let his hand caress her cheek. She closed her eyes and let him continue.

"Please, I have thought through every thing. I want to marry James." She opened her eyes on took his hand in hers and removed it from her cheek.

"I wish you would change your mind."

"Maybe I would have, if you wasn´t so stubborn." Lily was serious now.

"Look who´s talking." Severus smiled. Lily didn´t return it.

"Why didn´t you talk to me all those times I tried? I wanted things to be right between us."

"I couldn´t…I was angry, hurt and jealous. I wanted to show you that I didn´t need you. But I was wrong." Lily´s eyes were now filled with tears.

"I needed you too. But I have made my choice. I love James. And I will marry him. But I want you to know that I will always love you too. It was you who told me about my identity and learned me everything I needed to know before going to Hogwarts." Severus smiled at the memory.

"I´m so sorry for everything, Sev." Lily said in a low voice and walked closer. For a split of a second she pressed her lips against his.

"Good bye, Sev." She said and walked towards the door that led to the church. Severus stood still with closed eyes.

"Good bye, Lil." Severus said as she disappeared.

The ceremony was beautiful. Almost everyone in the church was crying. And in the back a tall, black figure stood. Severus tears couldn´t stop, he watched as the love of his life was given away to another man. Just before they were about to kiss, Severus walked outside. The sunshine was bright and the snow was glittering everywhere. He could hardly stand it. He apparated. He showed up at a small house near a forest. There was no snow here and the forest was dark. He walked up to the door and opened it.

"Who´s there?" a hissing voice came from a chair.

"It´s me, Master." Said Snape in a low voice. "Severus Snape, I´m back, and I give you my service. What do you want me to do?"

"Ah, Welcome back Severus. I have plenty of work to you." The man in the chair rose up and turned around. Severus looked up at Lord Voldemort and bowed.

"I will gladly do as you say." He said and pressed away the picture of Lily in her weeding dress out from his mind.


End file.
